


Belonging

by cecilantro



Series: 100 Days Of Ficlets [40]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-07
Updated: 2018-04-07
Packaged: 2019-04-19 16:19:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14241147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cecilantro/pseuds/cecilantro
Summary: Caleb is tired, Molly insists that he takes a nap.Makes sense he'd dream about Molly, then.





	Belonging

**Author's Note:**

> Gay, gay, gay, gay
> 
> No spoilers i think, but more context if youve seen 9x13

Caleb is so drained by the time the Nein gets back to The Leaky Tap that he’s swaying on his feet, he sits at the table sluggish and hazy, Jester talks to him and it takes him five whole seconds to really hear it. The group seems not to notice the way he’s become wheat in a gentle breeze, even Nott, she’s too invested in a muttered debate with Beau, scooched close to Jester’s side. It takes a few seconds to sink in, but it does, eventually, and Caleb smiles to know that Nott trusts Jester enough to rely on her the way he sees her. He knows that if she’d felt along or trapped, she would… run, the same way they always have, but Jester is there and though Nott is riled up and defensive, she’s not going anywhere.   
Molly sits beside Caleb and sips his drink, Caleb sees his head tilt and feels the prickle down the back of his neck of being watched, Molly scoots fractionally closer.   
“You’re exhausted, Caleb, you should take a nap.”   
Caleb gives an exhale resembling a bitter laugh,   
“I do not want to leave Nott at such a tense time,” He tells Molly, “I, I cannot just disappear to my room.”   
“Then sleep here.” Molly shrugs at him, takes another sip, “You don’t have to go anywhere.”   
“The, the group will notice, I-”   
“I don’t think they’d begrudge you a  _ nap _ , Caleb.” Molly’s head tilts a little further, to meet Caleb’s eyes, and Caleb shakes his head,   
“I cannot just sleep on the table, it’s, it’s obvious, no, I am okay.”   
“Don’t sleep on the table.” Molly’s head tips away from Caleb, the pull reveals another few millimetres of peacock from his collar, and he grins, “Here, snuggle up.” Molly pats his own shoulder, “I’ll wake you if we need you.”   
Caleb eyes him dubiously, his jaw clenched to prevent his teeth chattering with the exhaustion in his bones.   
“And you will not let Jester draw a dick on my face whilst I’m out?” He asks, Molly fakes thinking about it, but at a low look from Caleb, chuckles,   
“I’ll keep you safe, Caleb, promise.”   
Caleb blames the exhaustion, he moves closer and sets his head gently on Molly’s shoulder. Molly smells faintly of smoke and blood, memories from the day before’s disaster, but mostly, he smells of lavender. Caleb has seen his little bottles of lavender oil, he wouldn’t be surprised to find that Molly daubs himself with the stuff in the mornings. It’s pleasant, actually, and the warmth and security and the smell of lavender claim him, quickly, hands that take hold and pull him away almost the instant he’s settled against Molly’s shoulder, he slips a hand to Molly’s leg to give a squish of thanks and feels an arm around his waist, and then he’s pulled away and Molly’s already quietened voice grows distant and fades into nothing.

 

Jester eyes Molly, his attention is on Caleb, she bites her tongue on the temptation to comment. He makes conversation like normal, as though the most touch-averse of their group isn’t curled against him like a cat, keeps his voice low so close to Caleb’s ear, and when he’s sure the others aren’t paying attention to him- how rare!- he tilts awkwardly to kiss the top of Caleb’s head.   
Jester knows. Jester is paying attention. Jester tastes blood in her mouth from where she’s bitten just a little bit too hard on her tongue and finally drags her sideways glance from Molly, back to Beau, she’s relaxed from Nott now and the goblin has moved from pressing herself gently into Jester, they’re talking amicably, it’s like nothing ever happened.   
Beau looks to Jester at just the wrong moment, she’s flickering her tongue to pull the blood from it, there’s a speck that she gets on her lip accidentally.   
“Jester,” She leans over the top of Nott, who flattens to the table almost instinctively, not the first time Beau’s done this to her, “What happened?” and she swipes her thumb to Jester’s lip, brushes away the blood, Jester’s mind creaks to think of an excuse and comes up with,   
“I just got  _ so excited _ about, um, um, um…” Roulette wheel, which thing to go for? “The candy store! I found out where it is, remember?”   
“Oh.” Beau sits back in her chair, placated, mostly, Nott sits back up, “And you… bit yourself?”   
Jester swallows the majority of the blood in her mouth and flashes a grin, the glint of tiefling-sharp canines obvious at the edge, Beau nods understandingly.   
“Right.” and turns away to Fjord and Nott.   
Jester’s grin fades as looks to Molly and meets his eyes. He blinks once, slowly, and she almost smirks in return. 

 

Caleb dreams.   
It’s not the same as the night before, there’s no depth, there’s not the sense of safety and he  _ craves _ that so much now that he’s had a taste, but there is a hazy sleep-bright world around him and in the moment, in the dream, he’s okay, everything is okay, and there’s Mollymauk.   
He hears himself laugh, the sky above him is dark, Molly’s coat swirls, wildly, he can’t remember the last time he ran like this, for the joy and adrenaline of it, rather than to avoid being caught or killed. The negative is thrown from his mind airily, tossed aside like an apple core.   
He doesn’t know where they are, exactly, but when he looks over his shoulder, the spires of Zadash are behind them and faded almost into the dark skyline. Molly stops him and there’s a hand to his chin, his eyes are torn from Zadash to Molly’s face and then Molly is kissing him.   
A dull ache. He knows, he realises, this is a dream, but like the negative, it’s thrown away because he doesn’t care. Can’t afford to care. He’ll take whatever he can get, anything, Molly’s hand is set to his back, his arm around his waist, and that warmth is weighty and solid, it feels too real, Molly’s lips to his barely feel at all. There’s the warmth and the gentle scrape of teeth, but no weight, he takes it anyways. He takes all of it.   
Molly is pulling away and pulling at his arm and he follows willingly. There’s a tree that wasn’t there before, Caleb watches it sprout from the ground and age a hundred years in the time it takes Molly to run to it, they climb, nimble and agile and Molly pulls Caleb the last few feet to a crook in the branch and they rest. Caleb’s back settles to Molly’s chest and he feels the shimmer-tickle of Molly taking his hand, he tilts his head back to meet Molly’s eyes.   
“Don’t leave us behind.” He hears his voice like a roll of thunder, but whispered, it reverberates in his throat and through the air, his Molly says nothing. Just kisses him, again, more gentle, then lets him settle, the two look out across a field, there’s campfire not so far from their tree. Caleb sees their friends, Fjord and Nott by the fire, cooking something or other- a mental note not to eat it, Nott can’t cook- and Beau, Yasha to one side, Jester to the other, she’s laughing. Not the bitter laugh, the sarcastic laugh, the one where her face twists and her shoulders tighten back instead of shaking, but genuine laughter. It suits her, being happy.    
The Molly at his back presses a kiss to the top of his head and there’s that weight again, the too-real, it confuses Caleb. And he looks to the Mollymauk sat against the tree behind him and decides.  
  
He doesn’t want this.  
  
It evaporates around him, he’s underwater and swimming upwards and he doesn’t want the imagined affection, he wants the  _ real _ , his eyes open and Molly’s cheek is pressed to his head and Molly’s arm is around his waist and Caleb turns and forgets the others might be watching.   
“Mollymauk.”   
“Better?” Molly’s reply backhands away Caleb’s determination, he feels himself curling back at the burnt edges again, nods, Molly leans in to his ear,   
“The others may not have heard you muttering my name, Caleb, but I did.” and Caleb knows it’s bullshit, knows he spoke only once, butts his head gently to Molly’s cheek,   
“You’re hearing what you want to hear, Mollymauk.” His head is still full of the ghost feeling of Molly’s lips and he wants, so badly, to solidify it, “You forget that I have a perfect memory.”   
Molly laughs, a little, breathily,    
“Caught me.” Caleb hears rather than sees the smile in his voice, “But I did hear you speak.”   
Caleb’s spine prickles all the way down,   
“What?”   
Molly draws away, serious suddenly, to meet Caleb’s eyes. The hand not at his back moves up his arm, instead, to his shoulder and cups gentle around the back of his neck,   
“You asked me not to leave you behind.”   
Caleb lets out his breath and it shakes, a little bit, nerves,   
“How, how do you know that I was talking to you?”   
There’s a brief glimmer of a grin,   
“Why  _ wouldn’t  _ you be dreaming about me?” Caleb’s level stare sees him flush a little, “And,” Molly’s grin fades into a gentle, warm smile, “It was a lucky guess, that you confirmed, just then.”   
“Fucker.” Caleb can’t fight the answering smile, and they both give a gentle snort of laughter.   
“Caleb.” Molly’s hand slips around to tilt the wizard’s chin up, to meet his eyes, Caleb’s breath solidifies in his throat, “I won’t leave you behind. Either of you.” his head turns fractionally towards Nott, “I can’t and won’t speak for the others, I won’t promise not to be pissed at you when you pull stunts like yesterday, but you’re  _ mine _ now.”   
Caleb can’t remember how long it’s been since he needed to breathe.   
“You are  _ mine _ , and I have very little, I don’t plan on letting go of what I have.”   
He’s tilted, so close, half-lidded, it’s unspoken and he waits, waits, waits for Caleb’s permission.   
“ _ Bitte _ .” Caleb breathes, and Molly doesn’t know Zemnian, but he knows Caleb, and he closes the hair’s-breadth gap to kiss him, Jester, on the other side of the table, re-opens the bite on her tongue and spits a quiet word in Infernal, the sound of glass breaking comes from the floor beside Fjord and all attention turns suddenly to that, a distraction, she sees Molly give her a thumbs up from his place against Caleb’s mouth and grins, brightly.

By the time the party has assessed that they heard an echo from the bar, Molly and Caleb are apart, a little ruffled, but presentable and not attached.   
Oh, and well-rested, too.    
That’s important.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, have y'all checked out my [Website](http://aracanus.weebly.com)? ;3c


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